Writing your Stories

One simple way to remember is to write your memories of your loved one using things around you, lists of questions, or even Internet sites to help you trigger the memories that may seem hidden. There are many things you can use to help trigger your memories.

  • Start simple – Pull out a blank piece of paper. Ask yourself a few simple questions about your loved one, write down the answers, and you’ll have a good start. As you write, you’ll remember more stories about (take notes!) that you can write about later.
  • When and how did you first meet?
  • What about her made you laugh?
  • If you could only tell her children or grandchildren one thing about her, what would it be?
  • What was her favorite thing to do?
  • More memory prompts – Visit the following sites on the Internet and read through some of the questions listed. How would your loved one answer?
  • Memorabilia & Treasures – Go through a few of her things if you have easy access to them – school or office papers, perfume and lotions, collectibles, etc.; think of things that represent the five senses. Think about how these “things” affected her life – how she felt about her job or school, what kinds of things she collected, and what they meant about her. Then write about the memories they bring to mind.
  • Write letters to your loved one about things you would talk to them about if they were here. This becomes a sort of journal for you, but it is one way of recording the type of relationship you had, and you’ll undoubtedly write about many of your memories together. Read Writing Through Grief, one woman’s account of writing letters to her sister after her death.

 

Related Books & Tools:

365: A Year of Journal Prompts (Volume 1)

“Instead of a blank journal that most people use, David picks very thought provoking questions for each day of the year and it will bring people to write about very happy, exciting, funny, interesting, difficult, challenging, and sad events and thoughts.”

 

 

Personal Historian Software

Write your stories or the stories of a loved one:

* Capture thoughts and memories as they come to you and organize them later.
* Included are timelines, historical events, and questions get your creative juices flowing.
* Add your existing word processor documents and photographs.
* Interactive timeline gives you a visual overview of the person’s life.
(At times you may find this software on sale directly from RootsMagic.)

 

See Also: Memory Books in Print

 


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Quotes

What the heart has once known, it shall never forget. — Author unknown

Photographs are precious memories . . . the visual evidence of place and time and relationships . . . ritual talismans for the treasure chest of the heart. — Robert Fulghum, in From Beginning to End

The heart hath its own memory, like the mind. And in it are enshrined
the precious keepsakes, into which is wrought the giver's loving thought.
— H.W. Longfellow

While both joy and sorrow are fleeting, and often intertwined, love has the power to overcome both. And love can last forever. — Deb Fulton, in "The Power of Love" from A Second Chicken Soup for the Woman's Soul

Recall as often as you wish; a happy memory never wears out. — Libbie Fudim

Life is eternal; and love is immortal; and death is only a horizon; and a horizon is nothing save the limit of our sight. — Rossiter W. Raymond

He who has gone, so we but cherish his memory, abides with us, more potent, nay, more present than the living man. — Antoine de Saint-Exupéry

In love longing
I listen to the monk's bell.
I will never forget you
even for an interval
Short as those between the bell notes.
— Izumi Shikibu

I have only slipped away into the next room, I am I and you are you. Whatever we were to each other, that we still are. Call me by my old familiar name. Speak to me in the easy way which you always used.... Play, smile, think of me.... All is well. — Henry Scott Holland

Perhaps they are not stars in the sky, but rather openings where our loved ones shine down to let us know they are happy. — Eskimo Legend

Memory is a passion no less powerful or pervasive than love. What does it mean to remember? It is to live in more than one world, to prevent the past from fading and to call upon the future to illuminate it. — Elie Wiesel, in All Rivers Run to the Sea: Memoirs

Let the joy of your loved one's life begin to take the place of the hurt and anger of the death. — Darcie D. Sims, Grief Inc.

Remembering the past makes hoping for the future possible. — Alan D. Wolfelt, Ph.D., Center for Loss

When a once painful reminder evokes a gentle laugh, when we recognize the joy of the present in an image from the past, we have arrived at an important moment. Those memories are being transformed, unmistakably, into messages of hope. — Molly Fumia, in Safe Passage

To live in the hearts we leave behind is not to die. — Thomas Campbell

Give sorrow words;
the grief that does not speak
Whispers the o'er-fraught heart
and bids it break.
— William Shakespeare, in Macbeth, Act IV, Scene III

If I am to wear this mourning cloak, let it be made of the fabric of love, woven by the fine thread of memory. — Molly Fumia, in Safe Passage

Grieve not, nor speak of me with tears, but laugh and talk of me as if I were beside you there. — Isla Paschal Richardson

We do not know the true value of our moments until they have undergone the test of memory. — Georges Duhamel

In one of the stars, I shall be living.
In one of them, I shall be laughing.
And so it will be as if all the stars were laughing when you look at the sky at night.
— Antoine de Saint-Exupery, from The Little Prince

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A FlipPal is the easy way to scan in old photographs so you can create your memory books or other memorials. See A Story Jar - another great idea for remembering.